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A Guide to Proper Communication There are two components to communication. One is the speaker and the other is the listener. Mindful communication then means that we are mindful to speak as well as mindful to listen. Here are some things we can learn about mindful speaking. Just like mindful listening, mindful speaking starts by dropping whatever we are doing and focus on what we want to say. You should speak with eye contact on the listener. You should not assume anything when you are speaking to someone.
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Instead of making assumptions that you know something, it is always a good idea to clarify what the listener already knows. It is then easier to tailor your speech to what is relevant him. in the same manner, a listener should also make it a habit to verify and clarify any points he is unsure about. Unnecessary assumptions can lead to misunderstanding.
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You need to pass through the triple filter test before you speak. Reflecting first before saying anything is very important in communication. Socrates’ Triple Filter test is a good way to reflect on what you want to say. The first filter is truth. Are you saying something that is true? Do not say it if it is not true. Filtering to the second level is important even if you are only telling what is true. The filter of goodness is next to truth. will it benefit the listener if he hears what you will say? You should not say something that will not benefit or will hurt another even if it is the truth. After passing this second test, you should proceed to the third test. The filter of appropriateness is the last and final filter. For this test, we need to determine if it is the right time, place, and person to say what you have to say. Your motive for saying something is good if you pass your speech through the triple filter test and it is not something that has some hidden agenda. As you are speaking you should be mindful of a few tings. If you are a mindful speaker then consider carefully the words you choose that is be appropriate and accurate. Make sure that tone is right for what you want to say. What type of tone do you have – friendly, warm or hostile? Are you criticizing or judging? You should be careful with the way you use your body, your gestures, and your posture when you deliver your message. If you want your listener to be receptive, then make sure that you speak in a friendly manner than being very harsh. If you find it difficult to be mindful of how your speak, just keep on practicing because practice will soon make you good at it. Being mindful of the way we talk to others is important to have a strong relationships, transformed in a positive way.